At 27 years old, left-hander Josh Outman still has a great chance to make a memorable baseball career. The scouts like him, he interviews well, and he gets rave style reviews for wearing old-school socks up to his knees.
But this bit of infamy, Outman will have a tough time keeping down — err, living down. Yes, hold on to your breakfast, folks: The Colorado Rockies placed Outman on the disabled list with a strained oblique muscle reportedly caused by violent vomiting.
Outman's brother said on Twitter that he got food poisoning at a Denny's restaurant.
"No joke," Zach Outman said.
No joke? You mean like "Rockies hurler injured while hurling"? No joke, indeed.
There are actually all kinds of remarks about this technicolor yawn that we could regurgitate here. But, since the local CSIs haven't dusted Outman's vomit yet, let's not be hasty in pinning all of this on the Grand Slam Breakfast.
Outman had made the club as a lefty reliever, but Rockies manager for life Jim Tracy told MLB.com they'll make other plans for now:
"The food poisoning, there was a lot of vomiting and I really believe he strained his oblique," Tracy said. "He's been much better over the last couple of days but he hasn't been able to throw. We haven't been able to get him to the mound. So we're just going to err on the side of caution."
If only Outman had a side of caution instead of a side of, say, hash browns. Despite being disgusting and unbecoming to many, vomiting usually is a good thing for the human body. Out with the bad stuff and all that. But whatever Outman ate prompted such an incredible reaction, he was doomed.
Do you remember when Sammy Sosa sneezed and strained a muscle? Unbelievable? Well, Mat Latos did it, too. Why aren't we teaching our young people how to exhale properly anymore?
Most jokes aside, this injury probably makes Outman want to throw up figuratively as well. He was a promising starter with the A's until an elbow injury forced him to have Tommy John surgery in 2009. If he had the intestinal fortitude to overcome that, he'll get through this.
There's no word yet from Outman himself. Perhaps, once he's had time to digest all that's happened, he will comment.
The regular season is here!
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